Consequences

By Hereswith
May 28, 2005

“I’m sorry.”

“Sorry?” It came out harsher than he had intended, but when he saw her flinch, some small part of him was glad. “You said,” he reminded her, “that you would not give your word lightly.”

“Yes,” she admitted, her tone subdued.

He raised a brow. “It would seem that too was a lie.”

“No!” Elizabeth’s chin lifted, in stubborn response. “I meant it. I would have married you, James.”

“And hated each moment you spent in my company?” He clenched his teeth against that particular pain. “Closed your eyes, while in my arms, and pretended I was him?”

Something flared, like fire, in her gaze. “I didn’t think—“

“Evidently not,” James interrupted. “But then, you would have done anything to save your Mr. Turner, would you not? No matter the cost?”

She hesitated, and seemed to struggle with herself, and he was struck, more forcibly than ever before, by how young she looked, and how great a fool he had been. He was certain of her answer long before the, “Yes,” flew from her lips.

“Indeed.” He sighed, suddenly bone-weary. “You have what you wanted. I wish you joy of it, Miss Swann.”

With a slight bow, he turned to leave.

“James—”

He halted his retreat, fighting the urge to swirl and touch her, with all that was in him, because he knew it would make no difference, regardless of how much he might hope that it would. She had made her choice.

“I would have loved you,” he said, instead. “Not wisely, perhaps, but far too well.”

She gasped and he pictured the expression on her face, the startled surprise and the frown of consternation. Elizabeth.

And he walked away from her, then, while he still could.

~.~

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